Starry boy

 

Hii! I am doing this because thanks to you I have returned to writing after 10 years, it is my way of thanking you. Some texts are inspired by you, your paintings or my experiences. I wanted to do it physically but it would be impossible for you to get it, in fact it's all written in a notebook 😅.

I tried to make like a story with the texts but it's a bit messy. I hope you like it.

I will mark with a star the texts that are made for you.

Take care starry boy ㅋㅋㅋ 🤍.

Updates here ⬇️⬇️

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1oXRtnBy70gBSneEg8KPRA86_7KVGhvSjo14YhyBZYo8/edit?usp=drivesdk

Starry boy ☆

You are a starry boy, you have your own light like the stars, you shine like thousands of them because you have them all in your eyes. 

 From afar we see you shine and although it may not seem like it, you warm our hearts with your mere existence. 

You don't have to decorate yourself or want to change, you are perfect just the way you are, so never let yourself be turned off.

Inside my chest

The waves drag me to the storm.

 I don't know whether to let myself go...

 There is something that calms me within this chaos.

 Too deep, it breaks all my schemes and I can't think straight.

 From the depths I can see everything except the stars, where are they?

 The sky has clouded over and all that remains is the sea and the uncertainty of this gray sky.

 I stir and come back.

 I untie myself and something drags me again.

 Too much intensity, the logic is no longer present.

 What I can do?

 My sea is out of control and my sky cloudy.

 You have the power to elevate me to the highest, I feel that I am floating with your gaze, the butterflies are not inside me but are fluttering around me.

 We are like two trees trying to reach each other but failing.

 I the moon and you the sun, always so close but at the same time so far.

 Will we ever get to intertwine our roots?

  I hope so.

 Meanwhile I will try to appease this sea that I have inside my chest and contemplate you my sun.

My sea,my stars & my sun 

my sea always intense, sometimes calm other times wild, be careful it can swallow you...

My feelings sometimes so bright others so gray.

The stars are outside of me.

Sometimes you lift me up and I visit them,

there I get lost in what will be,

there I debate with logic.

Both my home.

You my sun, sometimes you go down and give me a ray of hope, sometimes I go up and you burn me.

You guide me and make me lose.

I am a sunflower, I seek your warmth to survive;

You warm my heart but be careful not to burn me.

At night I am the moon I try to follow you but I can't reach you.

How funny that the moon can't control the sea.

My sun, still as bright as ever,

I'll be here waiting for you.

        "The stars are beautiful, aren't they?"

Starry boy 2 ☆

As fragile as glass, as ethereal as air.

Sweet as honey and distant as cold.

Your eyes are as bright as the stars, you have thousands of them.

I admire you from afar.

Grow and live.

Cry and laugh.

Don't be in a hurry to grow up, remember that sometimes you go up and sometimes you go down, I'll stay here in case you fall.

I pray and ask that your eyes never turn off.

I hear your laughter from afar, what a beautiful sound.

Butterflies surround me and I let them lift me up for a while but I have to touch ground again, I don't want them to take me away.

"May that beautiful sound never stop ringing" I ask, even knowing that it makes my whole being tremble.

the bitter with the sweet.

Sky and earth.

Sometimes neither one nor the other and I stay in the middle.

But let's remember that not for long, I'm afraid of flying and not being able to control my course.

Empty house 

I give you my heart,take it but don't break it please.

As you can see I already put together some bits.

I know there are many, if it breaks you can keep one...

I have a bad habit of loving too much and wanting to be loved equally.

I don't conceive the idea of half loving...

Sometimes my chest seems to explode.

I try to control it but it will only make the explosion worse...

You see it?

Do you feel it too?

I told you it would explode.

Don't worry, if you're afraid I'll let you hide here, if you're sad you can stay here, I'll wrap you up and you won't be cold.

With you I see the colors again, everything has a different brightness, everything is warmer.

Have I already got out of that maze, or did I enter in a new one?

Make this your home Let's decorate it with flowers and beautiful memories.

Let's paint everything in happy colors, here there is no room for sorrows.

Remember that there is only one key and it is yours, please don't lose it.

                    "The moon is beautiful, isn't it?"

beautiful eyes☆

My boy with beautiful eyes what torments you?

Injustices and disappointments turned off your look…

At such a young age and with the weight of the world on your shoulders.

They turned you off but you enjoy your own light.

Whenever you want a break here you will have your place.

Weird Dream

Last night I dreamed of a place full of flowers, The most beautiful flowers, A green field full of life.

The sun warmed my skin and my heart.  

I enjoyed dancing among the sunflowers;

 Loneliness no longer bothered me.

 It got dark and suddenly you appeared.

 If the sun was no longer present, why was there so much Light?

 Like a moth I approached you.

 Before me I had the most precious thing, You so bright and so unique, so full of colors that the rainbow had no place next to you.

 I appreciated you for a moment and we intertwined our hands. My body almost floated, I don't know if your grip was what kept me going or lifted me up.

 Inside my chest a wave woke up outside of me the stars, They wrapped us as if they wanted to protect us from something.

 We wanted to resist but as if by a god those stars united us...

 Do you remember that field?

 Promises from a past came to light.

They say where there's a will there's a way but there's nothing here...

Remember our field full of sunflowers and our starry night.

I will remember the light of your laugh and the calm of your look.

Take what is yours, take this sea, take it, I don't want to drown…

I'm lost

I search and I search...

 I look at the stars but I don't recognize them anymore or maybe they were never mine...

 I seek the heat of the sun but it no longer warms me...

 I want to see the flowers but they are gone.

 My world turned upside down...

 Everything is backwards and I don't know what to do...

 The water calls me but I don't want to go back there...

 It's too dark and I got used to your Light.

 It's too cold and I got used to your warmth.

 The colors lost intensity but I no longer try to enliven them...

 My compass does not point north.

 It will be that I have lost it on this path…

Cold gray

I have a hole in my chest.

A black hole that absorbs everything.

It takes all colors no matter how bright they are.

 There is neither white nor black

 not bright, not dark just a dull gray void.

walls

I built a wall.

 A glass wall.

 Outside there is a field full of flowers,

 flowers that I cannot smell... I see everything but I do not participate.

Protection or destruction?

Winter

I forgot to smell the flowers,Spring is long gone.

Only the cold winter remains that freezes me to the bone.

Everything is on pause There is no life and even though I know it's a cycle I don't get rid of that bittersweet taste.

I will stay waiting for the slightest hint of warmth.

Castaway

I am a castaway, I got lost in my love and in loving you

I glimpse a light but I don't know if it is near or far.

Enjoy and suffer, it seems that my compass has broken.

From everything you learn, in everything there are two faces.

Which is the correct one?

Who I am?

 A person is feelings or thoughts? I think a lot and feel a lot.

I let go and fight.

Who has the reason?

The sea or the stars?

No title

It's summer but I don't feel the warm.

The night is dark but not as dark as my soul feels.

I write what drowns me with colored pencils so that these words that carry this great emptiness contrast a little.

I wish my sorrows would be erased as easily as I can with these words.

It's funny because I don't even have rubber.

Stud after stent I try to stoke some illusion but I lose myself even more in this prison.

The heat suffocates me and the air sands me, I am and I am not and I am nowhere, I just hope I can rest.

No title

Red thread where are you taking me?

 I want to cut it but I can't, I want to untangle it, sometimes burn it and other times throw it away.

  I take a look from or far away,

  I want to get closer but I can't

  I want to call him but he doesn't hear me.

  I try to untangle it but it doesn't seem like the moment.

  Sometimes I see you in dreams.

  My starry-eyed child

  Although the stars surround us, your eyes shine more than thousands of them,

  You have the beauty of the moon in your heart and the warmth of the sun in your smile.

  Sometimes I look at you and I can see the universe in your eyes.

  Sometimes I touch you and I fly, I seek to intertwine my roots and you don't even want to touch the ground.

Deepest 

I need to get everything I feel out.

 I keep everything under lock and key

 I don't know if for fear that they will take away a part of me or that they won't be able to handle so much.

 How can I contain so much?

 How can I feel so much?

 How scary it is to feel like this.

 What a fear it is not being able to feel.

 I immerse myself in the deepest and there I stay.

 Is it my safe place or my downfall?

 Sometimes I look outside but I have learned to navigate in the deepest.

 I know myself and I unknowme

 I destroy myself and I rebuildme.

 Everything is a cycle, from nothing to everything.

 You need to understand yourself.

Could it be that I let myself be carried away by the current or did I fight with all my might?

It is very good to navigate deep but do not forget that sunlight is necessary.

No title 

I want this anguish that I have in my chest to go away.

  I want to start living without fear, that my heart stops hurting,

  Let this weight lighten

  I want to find myself in the middle of floating or sinking.

  May my being not weigh or float.

  I want not to drown.

  I'll make a hole in the chest to see if this will release a little the pressure I feel.

  I'm afraid it will break but it wouldn't be the first time either, if so I'll glue the pieces back on.

Hidden

The sea are my feelings

 the stars my thoughts

and the field logic, there I stay sane but I rarely visit it...

Sometimes I am the moon, from solitude I contemplate everything.

I am like a light in the immense darkness but I cannot see it or enjoy it.

 My favorite part is always the hidden one.

 There I hide,

 There I recover.

 I'm not afraid, there can be no light without darkness.

No title 

My soul is heavy and I have cried to see if this would lighten my heart a little.

 I feel that I am drowning and that there is no one willing to help.

 I hug a cushion because I have no one to hug... Even so, if I did, I would let myself? I feel like I'm in a jail, one that I built myself... I've been so suspicious of the key that I think I've lost it or maybe that's what I want to think.

 I take refuge in illusions thinking that they would help me but they hurt me more

 Was it life that put me in this dark labyrinth or was it me? I know that I am to blame.

 vice circles

Starry sky, dark night.

 Only the moonlight accompanies me.

 I go through each maze hoping to find the exit.

 "moon lights this path!" I beg.

 I ask her for help even though I know she is far away.

 "Could she hear me?"

 She watches everything from above with her great beauty.

 I ramble and ramble.

 I find myself going in circles...

 How ironic, "sometimes you have to lose yourself to find yourself".

 It seems that a curse is chasing me, I run and run but I know it's behind me.

 There is no rest.

 How funny that we always have the answers in front of our eyes but we choose not to see them.

 I fall and get up again and again

 I'll stay lying on the cool grass...

 "Rest my child, you carry a great sorrow on your shoulders."

No title 

My sun is asleep.

 It's winter here

 I take refuge in a cave.

 I wait and wait for spring to come.

 I'm cold but with those few embers I made a bonfire, "let's see if I burn everything and there's no trace of what was or what will be" I think; But who are we kidding, the only thing I would burn would be myself... Hopefully I burn and purify all traces of you in my being.

Although that fire and those embers are you.

You took a few stars from your eyes and put them on my chest, you thought that this way you would appease this intense cold that I carry inside of me and that's how it was, but that warmth didn't last long.

I try to stay calm, I try to match the heat for the cold but it just created a storm inside of me.

Starry boy, take your stars with you I get lost... Starry boy guide me with them because I can't find the way and I can't go back.

Andromeda 

My starry-eyed child, every time I look at you, the stars in my chest tinkle. Most of them are yours, I was collecting them until I made a galaxy.

 Don't look at me or they might explode.

 Full of colors and light.

 I opened my chest and gave them to you.

 Now I feel empty but I couldn't stand it anymore, take care of them because they are your home.

Goodbyes 

Doubts invade me. Is everything that is happening true or is it just a dream? It's so hard to predict...

That's why I gave you my stars, I couldn't hold them in my chest anymore and with each look they grew more, we made a galaxy without knowing it...

Your Andromeda and my downfall.

Now you carry 

your home on your chest.

I hope it doesn't happen to you like it did to me and that depth drags you down.

I learned to breathe underwater, I got so used to it that I don't think I can breathe the light air anymore. It is the punishment of such intensity.

                     “the sunset is beautiful isn't it?”